Anxiety

In the calm of the day, there brews a storm.
The bright sun merely a lie, casting harsh shadows of doubt.
My every nerve alert.
Not a cloud in the sky
but lightning is sure to strike at any moment.

My chest, heavy with anticipation of what may come.
Impaled with a painful blade
a deep scythe to harvest my happiness.
A deep sigh to sustain my shallow breath.
My soul bleeds and I grow weak.

Like a lion on the hunt
it preys upon my weakest moment.
Its kill is violent and without remorse.
It devours my sanity and leaves a rotting carcass of fear.

With rapture, I pray the taste of tomorrow is sweet.
That it will remove the bitterness of yesterday and the salt of today.
I fear it will be rancid and vile
but my hunger will force me to swallow yet another day.

The war within me rages.
My mind, the enemy that chases me in my retreat.
It relentlessly pursues me through the sanctuary of sleep
to the very edge of my life.

With no place to run, I turn and fall to my knees.
Exhausted, I bow my head as my fate approaches.
Blood oozes from my wounded soul and pools around me.
Sweat stings my eyes as I look up at my foe, prepared to fight.

To my dismay, there is no one there.

┬ęTroy White 2011

4 Responses to Anxiety

  1. Michelle (Fallon) Claxton says:

    Dear Troy,

    Your story is very moving….your poetry comes from the heart….Kudos to you for setting up this blog, telling your story and reaching out to those going through similar depression/anxiety issues! I received a link to your website and blog from my uncle Tom Fallon. I am so sorry for what you, your sister, and Mother went through all of those years, but as you said…It made you the man you are today that in many ways you would not want to change….Good luck to you and I will pass this on to anyone I know who could benefit/get help from your words of wisdom. Again, thank you for telling your story!

    ~Michelle
    Blaine, MN

    • admin says:

      Thank you Michelle. I appreciate your words and sending this message out to people. I have known Tom for many years and he is truly a kind, gentle soul. I can’t say enough good about him.

  2. Raquel says:

    great poem, it touched my heart. I just shared it with another friend who can relate. You have help me, with this website.

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