My Beautiful Son

As you lay sleeping, I lean down to kiss your cheek and taste your salty tear. I gently touch your soft hair and you sigh deeply, releasing this day’s fear. My beautiful son.

For the first time I see you with my heart and I weep. I know what your future brings and the pain your heart will feel. I have lived the horror your eyes will see. Don’t worry son, you will survive.

When you need me the most, I will abandon you. I will tell you I hate you, and mean every word. I will be demanding of you. I will test and drive you to exhaustion to prove yourself to me, but I am impossible to please. The stronger you get, the weaker I will say you are. The more encouragement you need the more I will make you doubt yourself. The brighter the light that shines on you, the darker the shadow I will cast. I am ashamed at how I will treat you.

But from this day forward, I will love you with all my heart. I will help you through to the other side until we meet face to face. I am not your father from heaven or this earth. I am the man you will someday be, who has come back to tell you need not be afraid. You will not be alone. This time, I will be with you the entire way.

Troy White ©2011

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